Four Men, 70 Kilos of Crayfish, and One Legendary Backyard Feast
Not Your Average Backyard BBQ
There are backyard barbecues… and then there are backyard legends. Four brave (and slightly overconfident) men gathered behind the house with one mission: conquer 70 kilograms of crays. Yes, seventy. Not seven. Not seventeen. Seventy glorious kilos of bright red, claw-snapping seafood waiting to meet their buttery destiny.
The 7 AM Operation
The operation started at 7 AM. Tables were lined with ingredients that looked like a cooking show exploded: mountains of garlic, chopped onions, fresh lemons, bundles of parsley, sacks of potatoes, sweet corn, chili flakes, black pepper, paprika, butter by the kilo, and secret sauces mixed in mysterious buckets. One guy claimed his sauce recipe was “family tradition.” The others were pretty sure it came from the internet at 2 AM.
Fish, Fire, and Brotherhood
Ice chests overflowed with fish whole snapper, thick tuna steaks, and shiny bangus ready for the grill. Meanwhile, crates of beer were stacked like a monument to brotherhood. Someone even saluted them before cracking the first bottle.
The Great Boil Begins
As the giant pots started boiling, the backyard transformed into a steamy seafood arena. Crays tumbled into the seasoned water like they were entering a hot spa except this spa smelled strongly of garlic and spice. The men argued about timing. “Ten minutes!” “No, twelve!” “Trust your instincts!” None of them had instincts.
A Table Worthy of a Zip Code
Smoke rose from the grill where the fish sizzled dramatically. Butter dripped. Flames flared. Cheers erupted every time a batch of crays turned perfectly red. By noon, the long tables were covered in seafood piles so big they deserved their own zip code.
Claws, Cheers, and Chaos
When it was finally time to eat, nobody used plates. Just hands, laughter, and competitive claw cracking. Butter dripped down elbows. Beer bottles clinked. Someone declared it “the greatest day in backyard history.”
The Aftermath
Seventy kilos later, full stomachs leaned back in plastic chairs. The verdict? Success. The only thing bigger than the feast was the story they’ll be exaggerating for years. Because sometimes, happiness is simple: good friends, great seafood, and absolutely too much butter.
